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In a fast-paced society, the fear of missing out can lead to burnout and the depletion of one’s social battery. Hence, embracing a slower lifestyle might be the answer.
People want to belong. It’s human nature to want to be with a crowd they can relate to and feel connected. However, in finding similarities, people may also fall victim to comparisons. After all, to find sameness, they would have to skim through what separates them from the rest and acknowledge the things they don’t share that put them apart.
Although this might put people in a unique predisposition, it can also mean they can highlight what others have done or are experiencing that they aren’t a part of.
This is what’s recently been termed as FOMO, or the fear of missing out. It’s one of those terminologies and experiences coined and popularized by the younger generations. But regardless of how or when it’s been established, it resonates with most of the population. FOMO is jealousy in more straightforward definitions. Yet, it can also be more profound and significant than the emotion.
It isn’t simply scrolling through social media, feeling envious of others going on vacations, and wanting to do the same. The fear of missing out doesn’t simply desire what others have that spotlights what people lack in theirs. Instead, it’s looking at what others are abundant with and questioning one’s worth. It’s looking at their vacation photos and thinking about the value of their decisions and inadequacy. This happens because humans crave to be significant and genuinely connect with others.
People fear missing out because they believe that by having similar experiences as others, they will enhance the quality of their lives and establish more profound connections with others.
FOMO isn’t inherently wrong. It also doesn’t signify intense jealousy over others’ lives. Instead, it’s the mind’s call for help to patch its self-esteem and avoid seeking validation from others. People foster this fear of missing out because they likewise fear being excluded and isolated. When they feel like they aren’t living like others, they feel uneasy that they aren’t part of the crowd.
However, while there’s nothing inherently wrong with this fear, this doesn’t mean it should be encouraged. FOMO may be a trending terminology that most can relate to. But this doesn’t mean it should continue to be promoted. In a world where most people’s lives are accessible through the internet, and people can’t help but compare theirs with others, there is immense joy in slowing down and focusing on what the self has accomplished.
Life shouldn’t be constantly compared and contrasted. Instead, people should learn to focus on themselves and thrive separately from the rest.
Seeking genuine connection is significant. It makes life happier, healthier, and more tolerable.
This pushes people to make meaningful decisions and seize opportunities they would have turned down. But this process is only ever beneficial if it’s motivated by authenticity to one’s desires and joy, not fear or intense jealousy and isolation.
In Choose To Be Happy by Knapick, the author doesn’t specify consciously avoiding negativities in life. He doesn’t say unrealistic expectations, negative self-esteem, or life pressure should be filtered out for people to live happier lives. Instead, he posits that finding the perfect balance of good and evil is vital to a better life. People can’t expect an utterly positive life but can learn to cope with its reality. Happiness can be obtained when people introspect and find qualities within themselves to improve, not by looking at another’s life and desiring what they have.
The book critically describes what people need to achieve happier lives.
It emphasizes not the quantity of experiences people encounter but rather the quality. People become happier not because they share similar experiences but because they’ve grown similarly to others. They shouldn’t fear missing out and jumping in on any opportunities that would give them the illusion of connecting with others.
Nobody should fear missing out. Instead, they must learn to embrace the spaces and blankness in their lives. They shouldn’t feel jealous about what others are experiencing but find joy in knowing they may not share these, but they’re okay. People must learn to unplug from their social media, which encourages them to compare their lives with others and relearn to connect with life’s simple and mundane pleasures.
They must rediscover what actually sparks happiness in them and not simply envy. These things are what they should pursue, for these lead to more satisfactory lives and genuine delight.
With how frantic life has become and amidst all the activities and pleasures society has provided, pauses are highly beneficial to one’s mind. This allows one to slowly take things in and learn to prioritize what truly matters, pulling them away from experiences that may overwhelm them. The world’s pleasures may look tempting but distract people from what truly matters. By plugging out and slowing down, they learn to pursue valuable things.
Alex Writes 